The Value of Parents

My daughter looks at most things in terms of a mother-child relationship. For example, if there are two boats in a book and one is big and the other small she will refer to them as the "mama boat" and the "baby boat". Or the other day she was playing with two tree figurines at her great grandma’s house and called one the "mama tree" and one the "baby tree." She has done this for a while and usually looks to establish a relationship this way.

In so doing, it has made me realize (not that I didn’t already, but certainly reinforced) what an important role a parent has. Children look for that structure and stability. Anyone who thinks a parent is immaterial or losing a parent or not having parents is insignificant has obviously not spent any time around children. You can see it in almost everything they do. They make sense of everything by establishing a parent-child dynamic.

Their parents, mothers specifically, are the centers of their world. They see themselves the way their mothers see them. They view the world the way their mothers view it. They treat others the way their mothers treat others. This is especially obvious with younger siblings. My daughter will hug and kiss and console her baby brother using the same mannerisms and words I use to comfort them both.

A parent is the most steadying and influential force in the life of a child. This is often times underrated and under appreciated. Just imagine the impact we have on our children and imagine those children who don’t have that influence in their lives. They are lost at sea. When I think about how my children view me, with such reverence and importance, the duty to raise and protect them almost become overwhelming. I want to make sure I’m setting the right example, treating them and others the right way. Judging by the way my children act and treat others I’d say so far my husband and I are doing a pretty good job.

When watching my children and the way they rely on me and seek my guidance and approval I become so much more aware of what other children are missing in this world and it is heartbreaking. I think about children going to bed at night, wondering if they are loved or children playing alone during the day wishing their parents would make time to play with them. I know I make mistakes with my children, but I also know that my children are loved. They know without a doubt that they are loved. They also get a ton of quality time from me, both together and individually. I wish every child had that. I wish every child went to bed at night feeling secure and loved. Maybe one day....