Results of the Poll

The votes have been counted and the numbers are in. Exactly 100 percent of you felt that having four or more kids is just way to much.

I am the oldest sibling of four and while now being part of that doesn't really bother me or especially please me, when I was younger I was very conscious of how big of a brood we were. I remember walking in places and people getting whiplash watching us as we continued to walk by. We were all very well behaved. My parents didn't have to really worry about us acting up in public. We were very respectful and presentable and most importantly QUIET.

When I see people out now with four kids it's like an event. They can never go anywhere quietly. It's like a herd of buffalo stampeding through. I just think parents today have so much on their plate that four kids is really pushing it. HOw much time can you really give each kid? I guess I'd rather be able to give the kids I do have more of me and not feel like I'm spread so thin. It seems like there are so many parents out there who merely have children just for bragging rights or use it as a badge of honor, like, "I'm so great because I have 7 kids." When did having more kids become synonymous with sainthood or make you a candidate for parent of the year? It seems like the parents that have more than four kids are always looking to pawn them off on someone else. (grandparents, aunts, uncles, family friends, the mailman, the bagger at the grocery store, etc.) They don't really seem to enjoy them.

I know this post is full of gross generalizations and there are plenty of large families out there who love spending every minute together and don't try to dump their parenting responsibilities on others. I just haven't met them yet. I love my two children to death and I wouldn't trade them for the world and half of me would love to have another baby at some point (In the very distant future). But the other half of me enjoys the semi-freedom that two kids allows and from a financial and practical standpoint, two kids are cheaper and easier to "maintain" than four. Instead of being strapped or just comfortable with four kids, we could be very comfortable or wealthy with two, or even three, kids. But that's just me.

Basketball Blues

So back in the day I was a pretty good basketball player. I went to college on a basketball scholarship and had pretty much played the sport all my life. That all stopped about 8 years ago, when I quit playing after graduating and pretty much never looked back. An old high school teammate who I've been in touch with recently asked me to play on her team in a women's league. I reluctantly agreed. Now, I've been working out every day for 2 weeks and am getting in decent shape. We had our first game tonight and I swear I was going to die. The type of cardio "In shape" I"m in by working out at the local gym is a completely different type of shape I need to be in to be able to effectively run up and down a basketball court without looking like I"m trying to inhale the last bit of oxygen on earth. It was a lot of fun and I'm glad I got talked into playing, but I am RUSTY!. My fall from grace has been far. I felt awkward, uncoordinated, and hesitant playing a sport I used to own; used to dominate! Fortunately, our team as a whole is pretty good and we won by about 30. Hopefully next week i'll do better. I console myself with the fact that I"m about ten years older than the majority of my teammates. Just gotta keep telling myself that.

Quick Hits

* Have lost 9.8 pounds in 10 days the old fashioned way. Lots of exercise and watching what I eat.

* My son is so ready to walk!

* My 2 1/2 year old daughter is officially out of "baby clothes". We now shop in the girls section because she is so tall. Kind of sad!

* Sometimes I wish I had my husband's life. He has it pretty easy as a whole.

So Old

I think I've mentioned that I've been working out a lot recently...trying to return my body to its glory days. Anyway, the girl I signed in with the other day asked if my last name used to be (my maiden name). When I told her it was she said, "I thought so." I embarassingly had to ask her if I knew her. Turns out I used to be her camp counselor almost 10 years ago for two summers when I was in college. I would never have recognized her. I asked what she was doing now, except for obviously working at my gym, and she tells me that she is about to graduate. I assume high school, not taking the time to do the quick math in my head. There is no way that many years have passed. However, it is COLLEGE she is about to graduate from. Impossible! Am I really that old? How did that happen?

Despite the marriage, the two kids, the mortgage, etc. I still look at myself as young. I guess I don't really qualify as that anymore. On the plus side, an 80 year old woman (at the same gym) who I was talking to while working out on the elliptical thought I was 18 or 19. So that tempered things a bit. But seriously...being a former teacher I run into students quite often who I taught my first or second year out of college. Some of those kids now are married with kids of their own. It just doesn't seem like that much time has passed.

Double Standard

So my husband and I (and the kids) went to Costco the other day. On the car ride over our 2-year-old daughter fell asleep. So my husband carried her in and sat in one of the chairs inside the warehouse, holding her. I, meanwhile, took our very awake 10-month-old son with me in the cart while I did all the shopping. While I had many people stop to look at our son or to tell me how cute he was I didn’t have a single person stop to tell me what a good mother or brave mother I was for taking my son out while I did major shopping. To be honest, I don’t expect people to. I consider it part of my daily life. I do it all the time.

However, my husband informs me that he had many people come up to him while he was sitting there (read: not shopping with an active 10 month old) holding our sleeping daughter to tell him what a great father he was for holding his kid while she slept. My husband is a great father; that is not in dispute. But no one would stop to tell a mother she was a great mother for holding her child if the roles were reversed. It is just expected because that is what mommy’s do; but if a father then does it society thinks they deserve a medal. Am I just being too sensitive or does it seem like quite the double standard? Why are mothers rarely praised and criticized so heavily when they do 99 percent of the child raising, but if men merely acknowledge their children they are treated like father of the year? They are rarely judged or criticized for how they interact (or don’t interact) with their children. Just seems to me that women are held to an impossible standard while men are held to no standard at all when it comes to the care of our children

Working Out

So, after a 8 month haitus I have returned to the gym for some cardio and weight training workouts. After day 3 I have to say it feels really good. Muscles are a little sore and body a little fatigued, but it's a good sore and good fatigue. Nothing like getting those muscles back into shape after giving life to a huge baby boy. Hopefully I can motivate myself enought to stick with it. When it comes to exercise I really need someone there (coach,trainer, etc.) pushing me, yelling at me, making me do it....I'm all alone now! I'll keep you posted.

From the Mouths of Babes

Our 2 1/2 year old daughter is a riot. Just general conversation with her sometimes is enough to make me almost pee my pants. It becomes even funnier when overhearing her conversations with other family members (ie: daddy or grandparents). Lately, she seems to be particularly hillarious. Below are a few priceless gems I have either been a part of or overheard.

* (Balding) Grandpa takes off his hat. My daughter says, "Did you lose your hair yesterday?" His response, "No, I've been losing my hair over time." Daughter relays to us many times tonight, "Grandpa has been losing his hair over time."

* We were shopping at the mall and I needed to try on some clothes. After I was finished, my daughter looks at me and says, very seriously, "I was very, very good. You can buy me a treat now."

* Daughter: What does a goat do?
Me: Bleat, bleat, etc.
Daughter: I want to pet a goat. Can I pet a goat?
Me: When we go to the petting zoo. Remember, you didn't want to pet the goat though.
Daughter: I want to pet a goat now. You'll have to buy me a goat.

* My daughter is putting play people into trucks and cars and driving them around. My daughter asks grandma what the girl's name is. Grandma says, "What do you think her name should be?" Daughter replies, "Her name is Girl." Then she puts Girl in the car by the window and says, "Here, girl. Sit by the window so you can see out."

I could go on with hysterical conversations my daughter has been a part of, but some things are better kept to ourselves.

New Kids

New Kids on the Block are making a comeback. Yeah,yeah I know they’re a boy band, or a man band now, but they were a huge part of my childhood. I can remember listening to their cassette tapes (yes, tapes…they are those things we used to listen to before CD’s). I’m not ashamed to admit that I still like their music. I have recently rocked out to Right Stuff and Hangin Tough, among other former New Kids hits. I’ve even got my daughter singing their songs. I’m woman enough to admit that I am very excited to see their return. Who’s with me?

Quick Hits..some not so quick

* Our son has discovered how to climb up the stairs. Up goes the baby gate again.
* EEG did not go well; will probably have to redo it. A very frustrating experience.
* We have been really low key about potty training our daughter. We bought her a toilet seat and showed her how it works and every once in a while talk about going to the bathroom on the "Big Potty". Other than that, we've continued to change her diapers and not make a big deal about it. All of a sudden this past week, she has decided she wants to use the toilet. While she doesn't make it every single time, she has about 90 percent of the time. Awesome and no stress!!!
* Got new running shoes today. A bit misleading because it gives the impression I might actually go and run. No chance in hell, but I do need to start working out...too much loose skin jiggling about. I long for the pre-2 kids body I once had....or better.
* We have had a rough 3 months with illness and injury. I am hoping April will be a turning point. Our daughter should get her cast off tomorrow (broken foot) so that will be one less thing to have to worry about.
* I've been thinking a lot about cravings and why people have them and what they crave. A random thought, but one I can't seem to shake...so here's the question..what do you CRAVE????

Don't Wanna Be Sedated

So our son is to undergo some testing tomorrow for a facial tic that developed literally over night. Ideally they would sedate him for the testing, but we are very uncomfortable with that prospect, especially considering he was hospitalized a month ago with serious respiratory complications and the number one risk of sedation in children is respiratory decompression. Anywho, I informed the nurse today that we would refuse sedation and she basically kept talking over me saying, "Well, let’s just plan on sedation and then you can talk to the nurse practitioner about your concerns when you get here." What part of "WE WILL REFUSE SEDATION" was unclear or confusing for her? It makes me angry because obviously they want what is easiest and quickest for them. I don’t give a flying rat’s ass about their convenience or ease of job duties. My concern is what is in the best interest of my son and if the test can be done without sedation, albeit a bit more difficult and time consuming, then I’d rather fight that fight. So, talk to me….am I just being paranoid and overprotective? Or am I merely exercising my rights as a parent and doing what we feel is in the best interest of our son?

Long Day

Yesterday was one of those days where I wondered why God was so insistent on punishing me. I ran my prior week's actions through my head like a movie reel trying to figure out my biggest transgression. The transgression I was now paying dearly for.

My ten-month-old son cried ALL DAY LONG about EVERYTHING. Just constant whining, and crying. My daughter picked on him all day long...just a constant lecture on what he can and can't do, what he can and can't touch, where he can and can't go, blah, blah, blah. She then proceeded to cry on and off for the next 5 hours. I thought I was going to come unglued. I’m pretty calm and even-keeled and I think I do a pretty good job of not reacting or adding fuel to an already lit fire. It took every ounce of strength I had left and every bit of self-restraint I possess to not scream like a crazy lady and run from my house yelling, "Save yourselves."

Why does it seem that when things go wrong they really go wrong? One kid just can’t have a bad day. Both have to have the same bad day. Today seems to be starting out the same way. There's very little that can be done to right the Grumpy Train once it gets moving in the wrong direction. No amount of redirection, changing the subject, etc. really matters. We just have to wait it out and hope that we all survive and hopefully start tomorrow off on a better note. Here's praying for tomorrow....