Thankful for my Valentine

I am thankful for and grateful to my husband for a variety of reasons. He is kind, caring, and well-intentioned. He would never do anything to intentionally hurt me, those I care about, or anyone else for that matter. However, probably one of the things I am most grateful for is the way he treats my family (aside from the way he treats me and our children): my parents, siblings, grandmother, in-laws, etc. I have a great relationship with my family and from the beginning so has my husband. There have obviously been disagreements over the years but my husband has never been disrespectful or allowed me to treat my parents disrespectfully. Even at times when my parents have been frustrated with him or him them he has treated them with nothing but dignity and respect. Furthermore, at times when I may have crossed the line he is the first to tell me so and for that I am grateful.

I often don't give him enough credit for all he does. But I am so thankful that he keeps the peace and does not instigate disharmony or discord. He has never put me in the middle or made me pledge allegiance to him while forsaking my family. He is measured and deliberate in his thoughts and his words and I respect and admire him for that. I appreciate that he has beliefs and values and is steadfast in those, yet also respects the rights of others to have theirs without name calling, belittling, judging, or condemning. I love that he finds the good in all. He is the eternal optimist.

I admire him greatly for his ability to be calm, reasonable, and thoughtful. He doesn't instigate or add fuel to fires. He is the one to seek compromise and try to see another's side instead of simply writing someone off or condemning them, even when he has been wronged. That is not easy, yet he makes it look effortless.

I am additionally thankful that he respects my opinion and encourages me in my opinions, even when they differ from his own. He doesn't browbeat me into adopting his views. I appreciate that he acknowledges that while he is the head of our household he doesn't equate that with the need to minimize the importance of my role or the role my family plays in my life or the lives of our children. He is not threatened by my relationship with my family or my friends; he nurtures and encourages those relationships as he should. I am especially cognizant of the importance of this as I know some do not experience the same freedom or reciprocal respect in their relationships. It is something I often take for granted as a given, when really it is not.

So, while I do not put much value into Valentines Day, I am appreciative of the fact that it is a day that encourages reflection. As I reflect, I am reminded of just a few of the many reasons I love my husband and am so glad that he is my Valentine. To steal a quote from the Bible, “Blessed are the Peacemakers.